I've been too busy playing with paint to play with words. I'm in a very dark place today and then I remembered that I have this little digital nook where I can go purge the fears that taunt me.
Recently, I overshared something really really top secret and put myself in grave danger. And then I had someone else overshare something to me and I realized this is what it feels like to be on the receiving end. Like watching a ticking time bomb and not knowing which wire to pull. I cringed and thought "Did I really need to know that?" - I wonder how often my friends and family think that when I overshare. All comes from a place of not having solid internal boundaries...and a lack of good judgement.
I really envy my friends in stable relationships right now. I have to wait for a lot more recovery before I can even dream of seeking something like that.
My health coach moves to Boston in June - I don't know what the hell I'm going to do. I'm wondering if there's someone I can hire to replace her. I'm going to miss her - she's become a very integral part of my life and recovery.
I have a god-sized hole in me right now - i feel empty and don't know how to connect to a power greater than me. I went for a meeting, made calls, did service, texted people. Took my lil guy for a walk. Just waiting for that moment of connection with Higher Power to feel whole again.
Recently, I overshared something really really top secret and put myself in grave danger. And then I had someone else overshare something to me and I realized this is what it feels like to be on the receiving end. Like watching a ticking time bomb and not knowing which wire to pull. I cringed and thought "Did I really need to know that?" - I wonder how often my friends and family think that when I overshare. All comes from a place of not having solid internal boundaries...and a lack of good judgement.
I really envy my friends in stable relationships right now. I have to wait for a lot more recovery before I can even dream of seeking something like that.
My health coach moves to Boston in June - I don't know what the hell I'm going to do. I'm wondering if there's someone I can hire to replace her. I'm going to miss her - she's become a very integral part of my life and recovery.
I have a god-sized hole in me right now - i feel empty and don't know how to connect to a power greater than me. I went for a meeting, made calls, did service, texted people. Took my lil guy for a walk. Just waiting for that moment of connection with Higher Power to feel whole again.
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